A million different things...

...are going through my mind tonight.

Why?

Why?

Why can't I have a baby?

I found out this afternoon from Eric that ANOTHER one of his sisters is pregnant. That is 3 out of the 4.

Don't get me wrong. I am way excited for them! Especially for Jennifer.

But it is hard not to be saddened as well. For myself. I know, I know, I know...I am just being selfish. But it is hard.

My time will come again, I know it will. I just hope sooner than later.

We have officialy passed the time limit on having a baby before Bailee's 4th birthday. (I NEVER thought my kids would be more than 3 years apart)...so that was hard to take in.

I just need to continue to have faith that it will happen. It will happen when I least expect it. When we are done with all of our other 'trials'.

But...I am excited to be an Aunt to 3 more neices/nephews.

Melissa is due in January, Rochelle is due in either March or April...I can't remember for sure, and now Jennifer is due in May.

Good for them!

One day we'll be the ones having another lil' one as well!

Bailee sure wants another one. She asks practically EVERY day!

Well, that is only one of the million things going on through my head. But it is the biggest and the most heart-wrenching.

The rest I'd rather not share. They are more of the stuff that should probably stay silent.

Thanks for all the kind words and prayers from my loved ones. I know it will happen...someday!